LOS ANGELES, CA—In what can only be called the most shocking
event in the history of the Oscars, the poorly-produced, poorly-dubbed, 14-minute-long
internet movie trailer "Innocence of Muslims" upset some of the
year's most critically-acclaimed and highest-grossing films to take home the
Academy Award for Best Picture.
Most critics and Hollywood
insiders had expected "Argo," "Lincoln," or possibly
"Zero Dark Thirty" to win the prestigious award. Most of the ceremony's
attendees apparently felt the same way, judging by their stunned silence after
first lady Michelle Obama announced the winner via satellite from the White
House.
The only person who seemed excited by the selection of
"Innocence of Muslims" was former first lady and secretary of state
Hillary Clinton, who accepted the award on behalf of Nakoula Basseley Nakoula,
the producer and director of the film, who is currently serving a one-year
prison sentence for violating terms of his probation.
"Thank you, thank you!" Mrs. Clinton gushed as she
approached the podium, the Oscar held high in her left hand. "Nobody
thought it was possible, but with the tireless marketing efforts of the Obama
administration we were able to get the word out about this film. Audience
reaction around the world was incredibly enthusiastic. Some may even say rabid.
Being a low-budget project, we only had $70,000 in cash to spend on
advertising, and we spent it all in Pakistan. But it looks like we made
the right decision!
